DH caught me staring at a small child yesterday while we were out for dinner. I didn't even notice that I was staring. When I see babies or small kids I can't help but keep my eyes glued to them.
I'm not sure what it is exactly -maybe if I look at it long enough I will get one? I think part of it is that I miss interactions with babies and kids. Before IF I was always the first one to grab a baby from a colleague who brought them by. Or the first one to play on the floor with the little kids in my family. I always volunteered to babysit for my cousins. I enjoyed being around kids, a lot. Now the sadness overwhelms me when I have to be around kids, so I choose to keep the interactions to a minimum.
I guess the consequence to that is having DH tell me I look like a crazy person, and remind me not to stare:)
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Our journey through infertility, to pregnancy, with a few bumps along the way.
About Me
- Andrea
- Milwaukee, Wisconsin, United States
- After years of struggling with infertility we are finally parents to twins thanks to IVF#2! Learning through the difficult time of infertility, a multiples pregnancy, hospital bedrest, and a NICU stay that life is life, there is nothing you can do to control it. All you can do is try to make the best of it:)
Our Journey
- 10/05-Got married!
- 12/06-Began TTC
- 8/07-Diagnosed with Varicocele
- 10/07-Varicocelectomy
- 7/08-First RE appointment
- 9/, 10/, 12/08-IUI #1-3=BFNs
- 1/09 -IUI#4 =BFN
- 4/09 -IVF#1=BFN w/RE #2
- 6/22/09-IVF#2 =BFP!
- 1/15/10-Hazel and Elijah were born
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IF Success Stories
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- Caroline-From Infertility to Baby
- Conceive This!
- Infertility Journey to Motherhood
- IVF on the Down Low
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- Make it Grand
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- No swimmers in the tubes, no bun in the oven
- Not How I Planned
- Pieces of My Life
- Someday, Someway!
- Swimming Against the Tide
- There's a baby at the end of this, right?
Multiples
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Non-IF blogs I like
Money Spent on IF
- 2008-
- 7/23/08 -$323 RE office visit
- 7/23/08 -$727 cervical cultures
- 8/11/08 -$948 day 3 bloodwork
- 8/11/08 -$536 day 3 ultrasound
- 8/20/08 -$285 for IUI #1
- 9/5/08 -$194 Semen analysis and cryopreservation
- 9/08-9/09 -$150 semen storage fee
- 9/11/08 -$194 semen analysis
- 10/6/08 -pending $3,500 for HSG
- 10/11/08 -$285 for IUI #2
- 12/1/08 -$285 for IUI #3
- 12/27/08 -$285 for IUI #4
- 2009-
- 1/24/09-$248 RE office visit
- 1/28/09 -$412 semen analysis and bloodwork
- 1/30/09 -$542 mock-ET and bloodwork
- 2/6/09 -$3,966 for IVF & ER anesthesia
- 2/10/09 -$1,819.05 for IVF Meds
- 3/25/09 -$1,290 freezing embryos
- 4/2/09 -$293 beta testing
- 6/1/09 -$3,996 for IVF #2
Acronyms
- AF = Aunt Flow (menstruation)
- Beta =Beta blood test, tests for pregnancy hormone
- BFN = Big Fat Negative (on HPT)
- BFP = Big Fat Positive (i.e. PREGNANT!)
- DH = Dear Husband. Even when he's not being particularly dear
- ER = Egg retrieval
- ET = Embryo transfer
- FET=Frozen Embryo Cycle
- HPT = Home Pregnancy Test
- ICSI = Intro Cytoplasmic Sperm Injection
- IF = Infertility
- IL = In-laws
- IUI = Intrauterine Insemination
- IVF = In Vitro Fertilization
- LO = Little Ones (babies)
- MFI = Male Factor Infertility
- MoM = Mother of Multiples
- O = Ovulate
- OPK = Ovulation Predictor Kit (tells when you O)
- Pg = pregnant, pregnancy
- PIO = Progesterone in Oil shots
- POAS = Pee on a Stick (take HPT)
- RE = Reproductive Endocrinologist
- SA = Semen Analysis
- SIL = Sister-in-Law
- Stims = Stimulation hormone shots
- TI = Timed Intercourse
- TTC = Trying to Conceive
- TTTC = Trouble Trying to Conceive
- WTF=What the fuck? -why didn't this work
9 comments:
I've felt the same way you describe... I miss the warm feeling I used to get looking at a baby. I hope that someday I'll feel differently, but now I just want to steal a kid when I see one ;)
Guilty of all of the above. Its all harmless until the parent pulls their child into a "safe" embrace while staring you down so that you don't kidnap them. Then you know its a problem. LOL.
:) you're the cutest. it's okay to stare a little. just don't drool or twitch while you do it.
I stare at everyone. C. blames reality tv. I think everyone is here for my entertainment.
I try to keep my interactions w/ little ones to a minimum too. I don't want to start crying and scar them for life :)
I felt that way too when going through IF,being around small babies was hard and when you work with pregnant teenagers it is so hard to avoid. Hope you get your own soon.
I do it too - I always get scared that the parents will think I am some kind of weirdo!
I have nominated you for an award - no pressure if you are not up for it - you can check it out on my post today!
Here via Lisa's blog...
I do the exact same thing and DH has pointed out it is a little creepy. I have noticed a parent or two pull their kid a little closer so the crazy lady that is smiling and staring doesn't abscond with her child.
I like your theory though - if we stare long enough maybe we will get one too?
Happy Holidays!
ugh, i do that too. i always compare it to a bad car wreck...you just cant help but look!
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