IUI #4

IUI #4 was yesterday. It was very similar to #2 (read-painful and took like 10 tries to get the cath in). I had a bit of a breakdown on Friday after I got two solid lines, about how I just don't know what we are going to do if this doesn't work. I am so beyond ready to move on with our lives.

DH's numbers were the best yet, 49 million and 70% motility post-wash. Those numbers made me feel better that just maybe this is it. Our RE performed the IUI (which reminded why I hate her....) and we asked about next steps. She still is very much against doing any medicated cycles and thinks we really should do 2 more IUIs before having another sit-down to discuss where we would go from here. I hope we never have to have that discussion, and if we get there I just might insist on finding a new RE.

I am currently skipping Hanukkah celebrations. I just couldn't do it. DH lied and said I had to go visit my grandma. I appreciate that I didn't have to go. After Christmas Eve I knew there was no way I was going to spend the night with kids and pregnant bellies. And, of course, there is always the conversation of our procreation. His family always asks. I wasn't in the mood to discuss it. They don't seem to get the whole 'we will update you when our situation changes or when we move on to other treatments, but for now we don't want to talk about it.'